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Friday, 13 May 2011

Image filtration.

Realised a minute ago that I have once again gone into tomorrow. Oh well, I don't call it tomorrow until I've had some sleep. :p Makes it slightly easier when you're talking about the day when it's just gone past 12am, less confusion over today/yesterday.
Anyway. Post. Blog. Thing. Yes.

My sister recently said that someone she knew was more random than me. And I don't pride myself on much, but I do on being pretty darn weird/random. So I asked her why that was the case, and if it was anything to do with predictability - after all, I am her brother, so she has known me all her life. Even randomness can be predictable. For example, if I suddenly write apple chicken banana turkey, that's very random, but if I asked you to guess what word I'd write next you'd probably get it in the ballcourt, because it's an ordered, predictable sort of randomness, if that makes sense.
But she said no, it was more because he just suddenly came out with random things while they (school group of friends) were hanging out at lunch. He'd just abruptly say, 'I had a weird dream last night,' and proceed to tell everyone about it. Apparently, that was pretty random in the context, and I can get that.

I suppose one of the things that I've realised recently - also when I've looked at this blog - is that although I see myself as quite random/weird, a lot of that stays in my head, and doesn't come out because everything that comes out I put through a sort of filter, a screening or something. And, of course, things will always slip through, etc etc. But it got me thinking - I'm pretty darn sure I'm not the only person out there who does something similar to this 'screening' thing. So I suppose the question is this: do we screen so much that what other people think about us can be totally different to our views? (For the moment, ignoring things where we're a bit more conscious of image, actions, whatever.)
For example, one event that comes to mind was at the Speech and Awards night at my school when I was in Year 11. I was getting this special award for outreach, christian ministry, that sort of thing. So basically I go up on stage and stand there while the headmaster says good stuff about me and flashes big pictures of me up on the screen. But some of the stuff he was saying was like (very much guessing, but this is the gist of it) 'Brendan goes out of his way to tell other people about the Christian message.' Hardly. I'm probably one of the worst at it out of the people I know. I don't think I ever told anyone a Christian that didn't directly ask me, in fact. Kinda sad, but I'm really bad at going up and talking to people. Or broaching topics. Another one: 'Brendan has been a great asset to the Thailand Outreach Team, Oasis group, and the bible study.' Yes, I probably helped out a fair bit with the Thailand Team. Oasis, I led one session, helped out now and then. I was probably one of the more frequent attenders, but that was about it. The bible study, however, I never got to. :p So whether that was just an assumption, or exactly what happened there, I don't know. But they did seem to be attributing a fair bit to me that wasn't quite deserved. Anyway. My little rant ended.

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