Busting Common Autism Myths #1

I thought that I might tackle some common myths about autism that seem to still be perpetuated about the place. I'm marking this number one, because I think we might see a few more of these in the future. To note - for those that aren't aware, I am #ActuallyAutistic.

Myth #1 - You Grow Out Of Autism
This one has been prevalent for a good while, even among psychologists. The idea is that you have autism when you're young, but you can grow out of it when you're older. (This also births a similar myth, that only kids have autism, not adults.)

Where this comes from is that most of the diagnostic criteria around autism is defining it by deficiency. Defining it by inability to be "normal" (whatever that is). The diagnostic criteria that we currently have struggles to define someone as autistic if they're doing well and prospering. A frequent pattern we see is that as people get older, less "classically autistic" traits are displayed, and so people are said to have grown out of autism. But instead, what is actually happening could be a number of things. Sometimes, the autistic person has grown skilled at masking (looking "normal" on the outside), and so the autistic traits are hidden; sometimes, the autistic person is thriving and doing well, and so less of these "problem" traits are being displayed. But neither of these mean that a person ceases being autistic.

Autism - and other conditions - are now being grouped together as something called "neurodiversity". The term exists for two main reasons, though there's plenty more that could be said. Firstly, to celebrate the positive nature of these differences, rather than to focus on the negative - diversity is something to be encouraged and sought after. Secondly, to help people understand that this is a functional difference in the way that the brain works, from birth. It is something that people are born with, not something that you can gain - or lose.

Myth #2 - Only Guys Have Autism
You've probably heard this one before, or that it's just much more prevalent among guys than girls.

And this is another thing with masking, because girls are often better at it earlier on, and so autism has been less evident historically in women than it has been in men. But that doesn't mean that it's less present in women - just that it's less obvious. There's now much more research around how autism (typically) presents in women, and I found the book Aspergirls really helpful in this. (Though, spoiler alert - autism looks different in everyone, so you get some girls that present more how it typically looks like in guys, and vice versa. Folks on the spectrum are also frequently gender diverse, which makes this more complex, but all good.) So yeah, it's definitely not just a guy thing. We're just good at being blind sometimes.

This myth makes a whole section of autistic people disappear; suddenly, autistic women don't exist, because women can't have autism. Which is - not okay.

Myth #3 - Autistic People Are Emotionless Robots
Slight amount of sarcasm there, but only slight - you still get people who pretty much believe exactly this.

This misconception comes down to a difference between feeling and expressing emotion. People on the spectrum are characteristically not great at being able to express emotion - which means it may not always show well in their body language or facial expressions, and they may not be able to describe well how they feel. But that doesn't affect their ability to feel emotion at all. In fact, I know many people on the spectrum who are extremely sensitive to other people, and feel emotions quite deeply (including myself).

Furthermore, this myth dehumanises us. It treats us as being less, because of the idea that we "don't have emotions" somehow. It paints us as strange and other - at best the weird friend that you can't really connect to, at worst the psychopathic killer.

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More myths will be busted soon, but there's three to start us off with! I've got at least another three ready to go, I think, but let me know if there's particular ones you'd like to see me tackle.

The Gender Of God

I keep being surprised by the number of people I meet that seem to think that God is male. Perhaps I shouldn't be, though - most of the language we use for God is, and the most common language (in the New Testament, at least) is either male or not obviously gendered (though we probably wouldn't use the word Lord for a female). Even if we just look at the members of the Trinity - we have God the Father, and God the Son (both very much male terms!), and then God the Holy Spirit; which isn't obviously gendered, but people seem to just assume it follows the trend of the other two. But I think we'll find if we dig even a little, we'll discover that this idea (of God being male) is not only incorrect - but that it severely limits the character of God.

One of the biggest signs for me that there's more to this comes right at the beginning of the Bible. Actually, there are a couple right there, but let's start with this one:

Then God said, “Let us make human beings in our image, to be like us. They will reign over the fish in the sea, the birds in the sky, the livestock, all the wild animals on the earth, and the small animals that scurry along the ground. So God created human beings in his own image. In the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. (Genesis 1:26-27, NLT)

Humans are created in God's image, to be like God. And in the very same line, the same sentence - we are created as male and female. This would suggest that both male and female reflect parts of the image of God. Not just one, or the other - but both. Neither communicates the whole image of God - and, I would even say that both together cannot either, because God is so much greater than anything we can be. In many respects, then, we could say that God is beyond being called by any gender or sex - because God is not human. Jesus is, and we can say that Jesus, when they are human, is a human male. But for God as a whole - or the other members of the Trinity - it's not necessarily helpful to talk about their gender, though we tend to do so as a matter of course.

Indeed, throughout the Bible, we see God using various titles and ways to refer to themselves that could be seen as male, or as female, or not specifically gendered at all. And interestingly, the Hebrew word for "spirit" that is used in the Old Testament is ruach, which is gendered feminine (in Hebrew language, many words are inherently gendered). This same ruach is the first member of the Trinity we are introduced to, in Genesis 1:2;

The earth was formless and empty, and darkness covered the deep waters. And the Spirit of God was hovering over the surface of the waters.

From the very beginning of the Bible, we are shown that God is not just male - or just female. Both male and female are found within God, and God is greater than both. Masculinity and femininity both find their origin within God; and these are not narrow or negative ideas of masculinity and femininity that we seem to see in some places today, but broad and positive. You see women in the Bible that are warriors, and men that are poets. Neither are considered to be "less of a woman" or "less of a man" for those roles.

Believing that God is male - or female - paves the way for sexism (others are literally not in the image of God, as you are), as well as a limiting of who God can be. If you believe that God can be only male - you are restricting how God can interact with you. God can never be like a caring mother that birthed you and nurses you. If you believe that God can be only female - again, you are restricting how God can interact with you. God cannot be a protective father, or the loving bridegroom, pursuing you relentlessly.

As I've already noted, however, God is beyond gender. And we certainly can't say that God has a sex, because God doesn't have a body - Jesus had a body, and we can say that that body's sex was male. But trying to define God by our own terms (as usual) always falls short. Trying to define God by this gender, or that gender, is unhelpful. God is not defined by our culture - God simply exists, and did so well before we were around. The metaphors in the Bible that are gendered are only meant to illustrate parts of God's character, and nature - not define their gender. God is more than male, and more than female - God is beyond gender.